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Past Relationships - What Should I Avoid Saying?

At some point in every relationship, the dreaded topic rears its ugly head: past relationships. And how you handle that topic may make a difference in the path of your current relationship. Here are some things you should avoid saying:

  • "He/she was crazy (or insane)." Laying the blame on your ex by labeling them as crazy can backfire. It might make your current significant other think things like, "Does he/she think I'm crazy, too?" or "If I do something strange will he/she think I'm insane?"
     
  • "He/she broke my heart and I was devastated for years." Statements like this are a sure sign that you never really got over your ex in the first place--and may even still be carrying a torch. Don't say this unless you want your current significant other to raise an eyebrow and act defensive every time you mention your ex's name.
     
  • "He/she is a %#!@$!!" If it looks as if you're still carrying anger, your current significant other may think you can't let go of past hurts and pains. Every relationship has its problems, and you want your current significant other to know that you can get past them over time.

In general, it's best to be as honest as possible without going to any extremes. A simple, "It ended because he/she cheated on me," or "We just fell out of love," is usually enough to explain the circumstances without delving into your personal emotions.

 

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