The Fear of a Long Distance Relationship

by Pralay (10/22/06)

So you want to find a lover through Shaadi.com and your first step is doing a search for some suitable life partners. There are a lot of things you can use in your search to narrow down the options like age, body type, religion, language, and eating habits.

But distance tends to be the biggest obstacle for many of us liberal types. I have talked to many people and heard these stories but it never hit home until after becoming interested in a successfull and cultured young feminina that just blows my mind. Let's make a breakdown of what it takes for you to carry on a long distance relationship through Shaadi.

Cannot see each other.
Seeing each other is very vital when you are looking to make a match. And it is hard to see each other often when you are separated by large distances.

Communication.
You cannot talk to each other on the phone whenever you want. If you live in different countries, long distance phone bills become outrageous.

Timing.
When you are asleep, they are awake. When they are asleep, you are awake. Heck, you just become email pals in that case.

Fear of getting close to someone far.
We all prefer close relationships and it is so much easier to meet, get to know, and hook up with someone close by; so the fear is that you will develop affection for someone far away only to see them hook up with someone else. Not because you were bad but because they found it easier to talk to someone else. They grew closer to another and wam bam, you are shoved out the door like a christmas tree after christmas.

Distance muddles feelings.
You cannot see each other and the distance muddles the feelings you have for each other so much so that the uncertainty of the relationship is unknown. If you cannot visit the other person for several months then being in an uncertain relationship is not worth the effort in many people's minds. Because if it takes you 6 months to even have the opportunity to visit someone, what will happen when someone else visits that person in 4 months. Love is not supposed to a race but in many cases, it can be.

Nagging Friends.
There is also the fear of what your friends will think. Why can't you just find someone you live near? How can you like somebody you never met? How can you be interested in someone so far away? blah blah.... Because of this, it becomes increasingly difficult for you to really discuss openly about your interest in this online person to your friends.

It is far too common for people in long distance contacts to talk for a while and be interested in each other. But I have heard of too many cases of them dying down. Losing the luster it once had when it all started.

Best Age to Get Married See our research on the ages of the average man and woman on Shaadi.com.

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